Art, Blood Pressure, and a Norway Spruce

by Marta Mazur

A hospital shift, lengthy drive back, news with dinner, and YouTube. What puzzles me is the disconnect. It doesn’t seem that there is much link between me, my quickly passing days, and what I see through the computer screen. I wonder how other people feel. The lady on the oncology floor did not have any of those worries tightly clinging to what she had… a low blood pressure and a hemoglobin of 6.1.

My blood pressure is normal, and the resolution is to take advantage of that. No kidding. I turn the news off. Since I cannot feel connected to the world, I must try to connect to myself. Building one’s own life is an interesting business. I slowly assemble the items, imaginary and real, that help me remember who I am.

My landscape must have strength and beauty. It must have a Norway Spruce. I will climb to the very top and see, and maybe yell… and if I fall, that is also a part of the scheme.

"This soil needs nitrogen to become a grand narrative", cold wax and oil, 23 x 23 inch, 2021